Singing, Sambucca and Squidgy chips. In that order.
On being asked this Saturday, whilst in a somewhat 'merry' state, what I had learnt in the past two days, my response of 'absolutely bloody nothing' came as a dishearterning [if somewhat hilarious,obviously the fault of rum] reply. What I am learning, however unfortunate/ironic this may be, is that I am learning less and less each weekend, a situation which I am finding more distressing as the weeks go on. [this is a lie]
Well I for one think this chappie needs to chill out.
SO mindful that I am clutching at straws [very short, skinny ones at that; the kind you'd get in those orange juice cartons they give to children under the age of five], here's a list of the things I learnt this weekend:
ONE] There's nothing like a good old sing song in the night with a guitar and a group of merry people round
a cat and a bottle of blueberry vodka? [obviously the cat and the vodka are mutually exclusive here
otherwise we'd be arrested, although she does likes to put pretty much anything in her mouth, no innuendo
intended] This is always a good idea:
a] because everyone seems to enjoy this. Even if you're not singing [which you will be], it'll
put you in a really nice mood. It's like the marshmallow of 'group gatherings', but not when
you burn them on a fire, because that would just be sad.
b] if there isn't a camera; anywhere. I always seem to think that even if I am merry and holding
my phone filming such things the microphone won't pick my voice up. Unfortunately on this
point I am probably as wrong as the love child of David Gest and Donatella Versace would
look.
I couldn't find them in a photograph together. Good job really. It'd probably crack my screen.
TWO] Recording all weekend is draining but incredibly rewarding and fun. [like when you're half way through a
brilliant film, surrounded by pizza and candy floss but your eyes feel insanely heavy and drop a millimetre
every second]; but at the risk of my old head mistress hunting me down and beating me to death, " I wish
I had more time!". It's all worth it though because
a] I've always wanted to go to Japan and we're definitely going to play Japan, so that's good.
[this is 1oo% hope and o% fact]
b] people always think you're more interesting when you say you're in a band. It's miraculous.
the person you are talking to can practically be asleep, but the moment you mention the
word 'band' they're awake, buying you a drink and holding your coat before you can say
'the ting tings'. [obviously this is a lie. The only things that do wonders like that are steroids
and/or Jodie Marsh walking through a retirement home holding cups of tea; and
c] I can't imagine spending this much effort/time doing anything else.
This is us playing in Japan obviously, with some people we found in the street who we taught to play the triangle and things.
THREE] The 'sad face' really does work. I know that last week I perhaps gave away my weakness in a moment
of madness [as mad as you can get at work at ten in the morning], but this week I fight back with my
secret weapon. The last few days saw me use it on a number of occasions, each with successful
effect which makes me pretty sure that if the andrex puppy and I were in a sad face competition, I would
win, but probably only because I could smile afterwards. If the puppy smiled that would just be strange,
and impossible, so it'd probably get disqualified, which means I would win anyway so....jpg)
This puppy is not sad, it's pissed off.
I'm pretty sure next weekend will be more bountiful and I will learn a multitude of facts, like 'going out in London with a bunch of superheroes is a recipe for disaster'.
I'll keep you posted.
x
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