PLEASE DON'T READ IF EATING [OR ABOUT TO EAT; ESPECIALLY PIZZA]

TODAY I have learnt that:

ONE] It is possible for me to be put off pizza: Yes, today is the day that I have finally been putt off pizza. On
         the phone tonight I was told by someone I know [and who therefore knows my love of a particular
         cheesy, doughy dish] that their leg 'Looks like pizza'. 'What in God's name can this mean?' I thought. Then
         I remembered that they had fallen off a bike, thus meaning that in some way, the injury sustained must
         have made the leg look like pizza. Sadly this thought did not make me feel any better, especially as I had
         agreed to receive a photo:

The text was followed with the words 'Free salad bar!'...

      I apologise to you all, but I had to share it. It is making me feel so sick but I can't stop LOOKING AT IT;
      mainly in disbelief. And so there it is, pizza has officially been ruined for me forever. Kids, please wear
      padding when cycling.

STANLEY

whatstanleysays@gmail.com